Secret #20

She has told her daughter all her last words, her plan for her funeral and her ceremony. As a Buddhist, she has the conviction that building virtues in life leads to good death and chanting in Buddha names can prepare her to enter eternal life. Good death means die by aging. She doesn't want using medicine to prolong her life. For the Buddhists, it is more important to prepare for death than to prolong life; and that the most appropriate preparation for death is the way one has led his or her life in general. She has made to age 98, She prefers preparing for death at home than prolonging life in hospitals.

Although palliative or hospice care is an appropriate element in preparation for death, it is only an element of such preparation. A good death does not simply happen. It is a task in which the Buddhist must engage. Buddhists must confront the temptations and practice the virtues that help them prepare for a good death. She has a willingness to hand herself over to Buddhas. She believes that "Buddha is faithful when we are dependent, as we always are. Buddha is faithful when we are dying, as we all will." Buddhist art of dying demands surrender rather than control, handing oneself over to Buddha without clinging to life at all costs.